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  1. #1

    Sunday morning commute

    As some of you know I usually work nights & occasionally have to work weekends as well
    But the one thing I don't mind about working on saturday nights is the drive home on a sunday morning, empty roads FTW

    Now I haven't had much chance to properly enjoy the sunday morning commute for a while for various reasons, 1. not having worked a saturday night for a while and 2. the weather not being so friendly when I have. If it's wet I'll just limit my fun to some lift off oversteer on the roundabouts I have to go around as anything else would just be a bit too wreckless & dangerous.

    This morning however :D I stepped outside after a 13 hour shift (conned by the clocks going back ) the weather was dry, the air was cold and the roads were empty..................ooooohhhh yeahhh!! Jumped in, start her up, buckled up, Epic CD of win on & I'm ready to go. Just a leisurely plod out of the industrial estate and onto the dual carriageway, bit of a boring trek along there for a bit while I'm watching the gauges waiting for the temps to come up. As soon as the oil is nicely up to temperature I start to take her beyond 4,000 rpm's coming up to 90-100 disco metres per second and slowly start to reel in a Volvo S60. As we're approaching a big island the Volvo starts to brake, I blip the throttle & into 4th, heel & toe into 3rd, braking harder then heel & toe into 2nd, have a good look if anything's coming, then let rip....straight line it then throw it into to the apex of the roundabout then throw it left into the exit & onto the DC, 7,000 rpm, snap change into 3rd - short shifters are fan****ingtastic - back to 7k & snatch 4th, back to 7k again and into 5th.
    3 miles of DC dealt with pretty swiftly and I'm approaching another big island. The lights are red so I'm into 4th, blip it into 3rd when suddenly the lights start to change. So with the Volvo up my arse I nail it, then hard on the brakes - wilwoods rock btw - heel & toe into 2nd, across 3 lanes to hit the apex of the roundabout beautifully, then pull 3rd, throw it left back across 2 lanes kiss the next apex and flow into the outside lane pulling 4th & the Volvo's headlights are well into the distance behind me. Pulling 5th the road turns to single carriageway and a lorry is quickly dispatched before I have to calm down as the road gets dicey due to the turnoffs, junctions, reduced speed limit and built up areas all around it. Mr. Volvo then makes a reappearance on my bumper for the rod to then become a DC again so it's 3rd gear to the limiter, 4th then hard on the brakes for another roundabout, heel & toe into 3rd then 2nd, throw it into the turn (solid 90 degree right turn) plant the throttle and anticipate the understeer. Well let me tell you, because it was dry & the tyres warmed up there wasn't a sniff of understeer, this little bitch gripped that tarmac like a crack whore clutching a £20 note tied to the back of a moving car, no need for any lift off correction

    Back onto another DC, to the limiter in every gear. The specs cameras can **** right off as I'm turning off before the 2nd camera so can't catch me Mr. Volvo has a similar idea before he realises I'm slowing down to turn right at some traffic lights, thinks he's clever by flying past me on the inside lane then realising there's another specs camera about 500 yards away cue massive nosedive and his ABS probably having an absolutely huge shit fit coupled with what I suspect was a swift change in the colour of his underwear and that was just the warm up to the country lane I was about to tackle

    It's now 6.20am, normally I'd be home & in front of the TV by then but here I was, staring down the beginning of 1 of my favourite roads. Foot to the floor me & the car are one with the road, the brakes are fantastic, the gear changes are sharp & precise, the feel & precision through the manual steering on turn in is glorious, the throttle response as I power out of the bends is brutally instant The road is empty so I can attack the bends with impunity, using both sides of the road, kissing every single apex of every single bend with delightful accuracy and on all the big scary bends just grip, grip, grip & more ****ing grip, not a sniff of understeer, despite the tyres screaming like pigs they just keep gripping & transmit the power from that screaming F7P war machine with venomous ease.
    I then come to the end of the twisty stuff approaching some lights, pull a swift U-turn and do it all over again in the other direction

    I get home, pull onto the drive and get out of the car with it still running. As I go to get the bit of cardboard to put underneath her to catch the oil thats leaking out, I reflect on all it's problems & shortfalls - the blowing exhaust, the exhaust rattling like a bastard, the oil leaks - and none of them mattered in the slightest, the engine could've blown up there & then but not even that would have been able to take the smile off my face. The old girl done me proud this day and I love her to bits for it.
    As I patted the roof in approval I looked at the cars on my drive & on the street, Astra VXR, Focus ST, 4Motion Golf & a Clio V6 and thought to myself, clueless tossers the lot of you, give me a choice & I'd take the little valver over the lot of them in a heartbeat. Then it's inside for a beer & MOTD

    This is for all you clio haters, doubters or troubled owners, keep at it, keep the faith, it's well worth it even if it's just for those short 20 minuite bursts evry once in a while. Or for those of you that aspire to F7R's & widetracks & can't quite make it, don't despair the humble valver is still a very capable machine and always has the ability to put a big cheesy grin on your face.

    Clio 1.8 16v

  2. #2
    Forum User schakal's Avatar
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    cant be arsed to read all that ^^^
    let me guess ... your cardboard oil sucker caught fire
    burning the whole car ??
    hate to say we told you

  3. #3
    Whats up? Too many big words for ya?

  4. #4
    Forum User
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    excellent

  5. #5
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    HEHEHE! great innit? its small moments in time grasped with both hands,fellin your heart pounding in your chest.

    True karma for a petrol head...........amen!!!

  6. #6
    Forum User pieman's Avatar
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    absoulty amazing what a cacking story mate!!!

  7. #7
    Forum User fasterthanjesus's Avatar
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    goodworkfella.

  8. #8
    Forum User schakal's Avatar
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    paddy, i often have wet dreams about you,
    but it sounds to me you have either wet the bed
    or have a "freak" f7p engine in that clio .

    either way good *story/imagination :D




    * = delete as applicable :P

  9. #9
    Forum User flash's Avatar
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    great story pad. enjoyed reading that.. will have to go out for a drive very soon!
    nothing beats slaying a car thats worth multiple amounts than your clio !
    had a simular experience with a new celica..
    shoulda seen the look on his girlfriends face as i trounced him off the lights..
    woulda loved to have seen what was running through her head as i was a little spec in the distance ! haha

  10. #10
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    been off the road since june...i miss my car, i want the money to get it on the black stuff again.


 

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