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View Full Version : Showering..... really worth a read



Rott
27-02-2006, 16:22
How To Shower Like a Woman

Take off cloths and place them sectioned in laundry basket according to
lights and darks.

Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
more
sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc.

Get in the shower.

Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and
pumice
stone.

Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
vitamins.

Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced.

Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until
red.

Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.

Rinse conditioner off hair.

Shave armpits and legs.

Turn off shower.

Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.

Spray mold spots with Tile cleaner.

Get out of shower.

Dry with towel the size of a small country.

Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head.

If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.


How To Shower Like a Man

Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in
a
pile.

Walk naked to the bathroom.

If you see wife along the way, shake willy at her making the 'woo-woo'
sound.

Look at your manly physique in the mirror.

Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum.

Get in the shower.

Wash your face.

Wash your armpits.

Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off.

Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.

Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.

Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.

Wash your hair.

Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

Wee.

Rinse off and get out of shower.

Partially dry off.

Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath
the
whole time.

Admire willy size in mirror again.

Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
Return to bedroom with towel around waist.

If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the
'woo-woo' sound again.

Throw wet towel on bed.
I KNOW MOST OF YOU ARE LAUGHING CAUSE MOST OF IT'S TRUE!!!!!! :lol:

lewis_willy2
27-02-2006, 18:22
unreal how true that is

roflmao :lol:

Lunner
27-02-2006, 18:26
Been posted before ;)

Clio b
27-02-2006, 18:28
ha ha ha..... very good! so much is true! :D

Swervin_Mervin
27-02-2006, 18:31
I don't wave my willy. I fake dry hump her instead. :P

big hp
27-02-2006, 21:13
How true.

Forgot to add,

Go downstairs and slap willy on g/f's face while she's layed on sofa watching eastenders :lol:


Or is that just me?????

steveos_16valver
27-02-2006, 21:44
flmao thats wicked nearly pissed my self :)

Clio b
27-02-2006, 21:46
hmmmmy ex used 2 do silly stuff like that.... idiot! :D

Rott
27-02-2006, 22:09
hmmmmy ex used 2 do silly stuff like that.... idiot! :D

Silly??????

That's par for the course if ur male :lol:

craig100
28-02-2006, 08:14
100% so true lol

steveos_16valver
28-02-2006, 08:51
steveos says
flmao thats wicked nearly pissed my self

clio babe says
hmmmmy ex used 2 do silly stuff like that.... idiot!

what piss him self :P

kj16v
01-03-2006, 22:38
How true.

Forgot to add,

Go downstairs and slap willy on g/f's face while she's layed on sofa watching eastenders :lol:


Or is that just me?????
No it's not!

big hp
01-03-2006, 23:35
Haha good man. Gotta be done, they like it really. ex's mates used to laugh and think it was sweet :shock: