fasterthanjesus
15-02-2006, 16:53
A man goes into a bar with an ostrich and a cat.
The bar tender says, "What would you like Sir?"
The man says, "I'll have a pint of beer." He looks at the ostrich
and says, "What will you have?"
"I'll have a pint of beer" says the ostrich.
He looks at the cat, "What will you have?"
"Half a pint of beer - but I'm not paying."
"That will be $12.65" says the bartender. So the man reaches into
his pocket and pulls out exactly $12.65.
The next day after work the man goes into the same bar. "What'll it
be today?" says the bartender.
"Double whisky on the rocks" says the man.
He looks at the ostrich and says "What will you have?"
"I'll join him in a double whisky" says the ostrich.
He looks at the cat, "What will you have?"
"Half a pint of beer - but I'm not paying" says the cat.
"That will be $21.95" says the bartender. So the man reaches into
his pocket and pulls out exactly $21.95. The next day after work the man
goes into the same bar. "Excuse me" the bartender says, "I was just
wondering why, no matter what the price, you always have the exact
change in your pocket?"
"Well" says the man, "when my grandmother died she left me
everything in her house and inside there was a lamp. So I rubbed it and
out popped a genie. It granted me three wishes. So I asked that every
time I wanted to buy something I would have the exact change in my
pocket".
"That's brilliant" says the bartender. "You'll never ever run out of
money".
What else did you ask for?"
"A bird with long legs and a tight pússy"
The bar tender says, "What would you like Sir?"
The man says, "I'll have a pint of beer." He looks at the ostrich
and says, "What will you have?"
"I'll have a pint of beer" says the ostrich.
He looks at the cat, "What will you have?"
"Half a pint of beer - but I'm not paying."
"That will be $12.65" says the bartender. So the man reaches into
his pocket and pulls out exactly $12.65.
The next day after work the man goes into the same bar. "What'll it
be today?" says the bartender.
"Double whisky on the rocks" says the man.
He looks at the ostrich and says "What will you have?"
"I'll join him in a double whisky" says the ostrich.
He looks at the cat, "What will you have?"
"Half a pint of beer - but I'm not paying" says the cat.
"That will be $21.95" says the bartender. So the man reaches into
his pocket and pulls out exactly $21.95. The next day after work the man
goes into the same bar. "Excuse me" the bartender says, "I was just
wondering why, no matter what the price, you always have the exact
change in your pocket?"
"Well" says the man, "when my grandmother died she left me
everything in her house and inside there was a lamp. So I rubbed it and
out popped a genie. It granted me three wishes. So I asked that every
time I wanted to buy something I would have the exact change in my
pocket".
"That's brilliant" says the bartender. "You'll never ever run out of
money".
What else did you ask for?"
"A bird with long legs and a tight pússy"