Dodgy chat up lines..........

[big hp]

One each please, i'll start.


Me - Fancy a pizza and a ****?

Girl - NO

Me - good coz I don't fancy pizza.

[FATBOY]

nice legs! what time do they open!

or

my names fred flintstone, can i make your bedrock!(mate used that once was a complete disaster,not surprising really)

[big hp]

If it true that 'we are what we eat', I could be you by the morning!

[Lunner]

Is that a ladder in your tights or a stairway to heaven

[Justin..]

thats a nice top you got on, would look a lot better on my bedroom floor though

:?

[Gav]

fancy a **** :D [ never works ]

[Coops]

i lost my teddy bear, can i sleep with you?

[Scott-16v!]

babe are your legs aching? cos you've been running through my mind since our eyes met earlier

or

was your daddy a theif? cos he stole the stars out the sky and put them in your eyes

:roll: :lol:

[Justin..]

cheesy ones ^^ always the best pmsl

[Lunner]

Quick let me call heaven and tell god hes missing an angel

[Gav]

here is 10p, go phone ur mother and let her know you will be bringing back company.

grab ur coat, you av pulled

[Clio b]

u guys r terrible!
can i get u a drink usually works!

[VIPERONE]

is that a mirror in your pocket...

i can see myself in your pants

[Scott-16v!]

^fpmsl!!

[Zollo]

How much does a Polar Bear weigh?



















Enough to break the ice.

[Lunner]

Get an ice cube, chuck it on the floor and jump on it. The proclaim, Well i've just broken the ice, your turn......or somthing like that lol

On the subject of buying drinks.....

Can i ahve a [insert drink] and your phone number...only really works on bar staff

[2 live]

fancy a f**k :D [ never works ]



2nd ed lol



an women say they want an honest man. :roll:

[NickFr]

"What do you say we go back to my place and do some Math?...Add the Bed, subtract the Clothes, Divide the legs, and Multiply"?

"**** me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before"?

[Lunner]

"What do you say we go back to my place and do some Math?...Add the Bed, subtract the Clothes, Divide the legs, and Multiply"?

PMSL

[NickFr]

"**** me, all those curves and me with no brakes"

[northy]

''er excuse me'' always works well when i walk past a nice lass.


Then i get them with -

ME - ive got this watch. Its a special watch that tells me anything i want to know. And do you know what its telling me now ? That you have no knickers on!

LASS - Har, i have ! So there your watch is crap

ME - Damm, 'look at the watch and act stupid' thats right its ten minutes fast !!!

gets you a smile / laugh and a open door to chat freely !

BONUS !

[Mattie]

^^^^^^PMSL

m8 told me this 1 las night....

m8: can u do me a favour please love?

bird: ye sure wot is it?

m8: cum bk with me 4 a shag?

bird: **** off *slaps m8*

:lol:

[Willy 2]

Bloke: Fancy a **** luv?
Bird: No!!
Bloke: Well can u lay down while i have one!!

-------

If i said you had a great body would you hold it against me!

[Andy]

''er excuse me'' always works well when i walk past a nice lass.


Then i get them with -

ME - ive got this watch. Its a special watch that tells me anything i want to know. And do you know what its telling me now ? That you have no knickers on!

LASS - Har, i have ! So there your watch is crap

ME - Damm, 'look at the watch and act stupid' thats right its ten minutes fast !!!




gets you a smile / laugh and a open door to chat freely !

BONUS !

or if thay fails he sends me over .

[northy]

^^^^ true.

Deploying Mandy never let me down.

[Andy]

only because i have more front than brighton lol

[Gav]

Bloke: Fancy a f**k luv?
Bird: No!!
Bloke: Well can u lay down while i have one!!!


fpmsl!! thats awsome!