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View Full Version : Quite ashamed & embarrased tbh



16v_paddy
05-04-2009, 03:01
This is a bit long but meh :roll: well worth the read imo :wink:

Had quite a counterproductive day with the valver :x went to my mates to help him fit some 4 pots to the back of his volvo 8) but 1st job was quickly change my discs & pads. Get the discs out of the box and we're greeted with a pair of solid discs :shock: furthermore they're 245mm in diameter & 10mm thick :shock: the dozy cunt who sold them on ebay as williams items has either ****ed up & put the wrong discs in the box (bizarre mistake but understandable) or is quite stupid & needs shooting :evil:

Either way, I've sent him a message this morning but had no reply so far :x

So.....while my mate was cleaning up & preparing his calipers I went about topping up all my fluids etc - I've got a bit of an oil leak atm so was quite low- noticed a slight coolant leak but fixed that with some strategic jubilee clip tightening :D

That done, we set about fitting some 4 pots 8) took us a while & required some startegic butchery of disc guards that took us a while to figure out :roll: Took a lot of head scratching then some forum advice to sort it out - the way to fit these brakes requires a) brand new disc guards (**** paying £50 each for a pair) or b) get busy with a dremel :twisted: unfortunately the dremel died :evil: so I had to get busy with some tinsnips :P :twisted:
With a job well done, everything fitted up & bled we go for a test drive, all is well :D my m8s car now has Brembo 4 pots & 330mm discs on the front with the same at the back :twisted: albeit slightly smaller Brembo 4 pot calipers on the rear 8)

Shortly afterwards my housemate pops around with his V6 8) we have a jolly good chinwag & decide to get a chinese. We get there, order our food, told to wait 30 mins so we decide to go for a blast & general perv in the Vee :lol:

Here's the fun part, followed by the embarrasing bit.......shortly

Me & my housemate decide it's time to go home & watch MOTD. The route home from our mates house takes us down 2 of our most favourite local roads ever :D Spring Lane followed by Shelford Tops
I tell my mate to lead as my brakes are ****ing shit atm :roll: thanks Mr. Ebay seller :cry: :evil: I now have a very new & very deep respect for the Clio V6, it is a ****ing quick car on a fast flowing & challenging country road :shock: (but if he asks, I didn't say that :wink: it's a sack of shit plastic pig of a bathtub with a 406 engine :P )
The amount he pulled away from me was quite shocking, never the less I kept him in sight (ish :P ) but I daren't push any harder as my brakes were quite shockingly bad :oops:
I'm not trying to say I'd have caught up with him had my brakes been in tip top working order :roll: but the gap would not have been so big, but underpowered & gutless 1.8 valvers are not to be underestimated :wink:
We get to the end of spring lane to some lights, he leans out the window & starts spraying his bottle of water as though he's won the grand prix and the look on his face is as though he'd just jizzed :lol: fair play though as we had both just absolutely nailed it down that road, kissed every apex beautifully, all in all a fantastic drive on a brilliant bit of road :D

We then turned onto a dual carriageway & proceeded to boot it :twisted: I'm right up his arse - lightweightness coming into play :wink: coming to the top of 3rd & the torque of the big V6 comes into play and he starts to pull about 5 car lengths before we start breaking for the upcoming roudabout :? I'm quite scared now as - I've got wilwood 4 pots but with shagged discs & pads, he's got big **** off AP Racing 4 pots and ****ing mahoosive discs, all quite recent from his last service - I'm worried I'll run up the back of him :shock:
Never the less, we were going straight over the roundabout but you have to go around it, no straight lining this badboy :wink: round we go, I'm right on his arse again. On the exit I got a bit of understeer but powered through it :D he got the same but then the power turned it into some lovely oversteer 8) & allowed me to close in on him down the DC until we got traffic and single carriageway up ahead, so calmed it down.

That roudabout & DC blast was a very interesting comparison of the advantages of lightweight, agile FWD over big, heavy & powerful RWD and vice-versa. The subject of much discussion over beer & football :D

Now we come to the spectacle that is Shelford Tops. My mate owns this road and I mean ****ing owns it :!: I didn't even bother to try & keeep up, I simply don't have the talent or the confidence to try. It doesn't mean I drove like a faggot though :wink: I went ****ing quick down that road but my mate just left me for dead :cry:
Having lived near the road for so many years & driving it almost every day, he knows that road sooooo well, every single bump, crest, nook & cranny, it's truly epic. To put it in perspective, if I gave him a 1.2 fiesta and any challenger in any car (within reason of course :P something like a williams, scooby, focus rs etc) and let him lead on that road, no-one will catch up with him, if they could I'd happily put petrol & matches to my valver :shock:

Anyway........ I eventually catch up since we were being civilised & driving to the limit through our village :wink:
Pulling onto our driveway we notice a whole ****load of smoke pissing out of my car :shock: :shock: :shock: BLUE SMOKE :shock: :shock: :shock: then quite a bit of oil dropping on the floor :crybaby: :crybaby:
:crybaby:
Pop the bonnet to be greeted with lots more smoke - ringpiece winking at 10,000 rpm & that god awful sickly feeling in the pit of the stomach :cry: only to find
THAT SOME STUPID P R I C K paddy :oops: JUST NAILED IT, CHASING A CLIO V6 ALONG SOME COUNTRY LANES WITHOUT PUTTING THE OIL FILLER CAP BACK ON THE ENGINE AFTER TOPPING UP, SPRAYING A ****LOAD OF OIL ALL OVER THE ENGINE BAY, GOD KNOWS HOW MANY MILES OF COUNTRY ROADS & MY DRIVEWAY

Yes I am ashamed & embarrsed :oops: , I feel so ****ing stupid :cry: but I felt the need to share, as to most folk, someone elses misfortune may help them to realise things with their valvers aren't so bad & a bit of laughter at someone elses expense helps to take the mind off the bad things & enjoy life with clios that little bit more :D

And don't worry I'll take the abuse like a man & still piss myself about this little mishap for quite a long time :lol: As well as spending the morning cleaning the mess I've made :oops:

col
05-04-2009, 10:19
No Paddy,nobody else can tell you what a prat you were more than you self :lol: ......ive been their as well........great story though.


mind you thats a thought , cleaning your engine bay with oil..hmmm...tell us how you get on cleaning it! :lol: :lol:

busterhymes
05-04-2009, 10:21
what a plonker rodney :wink: it happens to us all lol

MatrixGuy
05-04-2009, 12:36
LMAO!!!

Dont worry mate, i did it a few months back, lol.

I thought, what's that smell?!?!

MatrixGuy
05-04-2009, 12:37
my heat shield will never look the same again, lol.

can't get it clean, and everything has a hint of brown/black. :lol:

16v_paddy
05-04-2009, 13:09
:lol:

well it's clean again :P gunk, pressure washer & a shitload of plastic bags to the rescue :lol:

MatrixGuy
05-04-2009, 14:29
:lol:

well it's clean again :P gunk, pressure washer & a shitload of plastic bags to the rescue :lol:

pressure washer?! :shock: lol. never dared use that on my willy, lol.

what bits did you cover up matey?

16v_paddy
05-04-2009, 17:48
everything that had a wire on it :lol:

took the battery out, every bit I covered with plastic bags had a shitload of kitchen towel over it 1st to soak up anything that made it through, stuffed the throttle body with it and covered that up as well
master cylinder, PAS reservoir, dizzy, coil, spark plug wells

Jamie.
05-04-2009, 20:36
Not even read it but thats the most amount of smileys I have EVER seen it.
:^o
:D :) :( :o :lol: 8) :? :shock: :x :P :oops: :cry: :wink: :roll: :twisted: :evil: :!: :?: :idea: :arrow:

Wobba
05-04-2009, 21:21
Guy who owned mine before me did the same. It's still a mess under the bonnet, I'll clean it all one day.

16v_paddy
06-04-2009, 13:10
Not even read it but thats the most amount of smileys I have EVER seen it.
:^o
:D :) :( :o :lol: 8) :? :shock: :x :P :oops: :cry: :wink: :roll: :twisted: :evil: :!: :?: :idea: :arrow:

My inspiration for that is all down to justin :lol:

wavy
06-04-2009, 17:02
:) it happens to us all lol :oops: